redbeard Posted March 28, 2013 Report Share Posted March 28, 2013 (edited) This story and photos are written in three parts as with the advent of the iphone, it's easy to go ahead and start writing. The hunts covers a 25 hour period. Hope you enjoy the humor in it....... I call it "The Saga of Pisser and the Un-Lucky Sons ah Beeches" The Teaser: The brief rain had stopped and although a quiet and eerie afternoon, I took for the oaks 'bout 3pm. Found a heap of turkey scratchin' so I sat up for the evenin' against a big oak just top of a downhill slope. Plenty of time for a nap and after clearing out the leaves I tucked my seat pillow under my head and fell fast asleep. Round about 4, awaking I scratched the leaves as if a hen lookin’ for a meal. Good time for a smoke so I filled the pipe and enjoyed the aroma of fine tobacco in the crisp air. Not two puffs in did I hear what sounded like scratchin just over the hillside. I backed up against the tree, scratched some more myself. 25 minutes pass, pipe is out and I gotta take a leak. Standing and steppin away from the tree, I no more than get a steady stream goin' and I hear fast walkin'; sounded like a deer and I expected to see one run off having caught a whiff of me. As my eyes cut right, I see not a deer but a beard swayin’ tom makin' a beeline for me. My stream instantly switched off as I thought; dang, now I've literally been caught red handed. 20 yards away he noticed me and did a stop and turn to his right with a few clucks as if to say that ain’t an oak and that beard ain’t no chicken of the woods mushroom. 20 got to 30 and he slowed to try and figure me out better, as my right hand was slowly trying to find the big 10 gauge leaning against the tree As he went behind a couple more trees I slowly brought the heaviest gun in the world up to aim As he stepped out at 40 yards, I had the red bead on his head...... Part Two – 24 Hours Later: The continuing (hopefully) saga of "Pisser and unlucky sons ah beeches: As you surely can gather from the photo, ol Pisser remains aloof, perhaps destined to be "one" of those birds born to be in the right place and do the right thing to become a legend. While he is not the first bird to catch me answerin' nature's call, he is the first catchin’ me at number 1. Surprisingly, I've had two birds cut me off from completing number two and both of those rode back in the truck with me, while my underwear did not. So, hyar's to ol Pisser for givin me another challenge. I might share a bit of knowledge now for those who this has not happened to....a wild turkey gobbler catchin' you has the exact same results as jumpin' in a frigid river...the ol turtle goes to hidin’, jest the same. I had to drink near ah six pack ah fore it would show itself again. Oh and yeah, just cuz ya got red on tha head, don’t forget to put it between the green. Part Three: The rest of the story, 1 hour later than Part Two: First off, let me apologize for giving such a magnificent bird such as the wild turkey gobbler such a moniker of “Pisser”. I had grand visions back in January when I saw this bird while squirrel hunting that if the Good Lord gave me the opportunity for my 99th bird, to be such a fine bird as he, I would name him “Maxwell Smart” for the Agent 99 tie end to the old series I watched as a kid, believe it was called “Get Smart.” But ya gotta go with the flow, pun intended, and Pisser was his name. While the saga of Pisser and the unlucky sons ah beeches turned out to be only a two part short story, I gotta admit that I'm plenty pleased with how it all went down. I'd say that even if I hadn't won round two. It's always more memorable if it doesn't follow the textbook, which we all know rarely exists in the chase of the majestic wild turkeebird. Circumstances play a big role sometimes as if I'd taken this iphone on the first hunt, I'd gotten pics of those young "jumpin' beech trees", then. Funny how a tree can just jump out there and catch yer shot like that, roots and all. Ya'll watch out for em, they have no fear. But as it was, I had to go back and take the pics of my "double kill". Said to self, might as well stay and see if he comes back. Sitting on the very tree I'd taken my relief by the day before, I marveled at how the woods came to life when the sun finally came out 'bout 6pm. The squirrels went ta chasin' one another all over the oaks. I noticed one young pair sittin’ on a knot 'bout 10 yards away, not payin’ me a bit of mind, even when I started playing my turkey call. They never do that in squirrel season. Then, out of nowhere, nearly 50 robins come off the forest floor in unison and light in the trees all around. That was pretty cool no doubt but i figured something had to make them do that. Peering thru the barren oaks, I see nothing larger than a big palliated woodpecker swoop from tree to tree. It wasn’t til he let out his shrill call that I knew the master of this oak hillside had returned. Obble, obble was the answer to the peckerwood call and all of a sudden I felt the need to pee. Ha, fat chance on that and I carefully readied the other side of the tree. With a couple scoohes, I was ready. Some pocket player play produced no answer so I switched to a copper track player and let out a few clucks and purrs. Gobble; gobble, this time much closer. Few minutes later, ol Pisser steps into view. Eyeballs the peein' tree real hard and considers it safe. As I scanned tha woods between me and him for those jumpin trees, I saw none and Nitro Ammo met Pisser square and fair chase as it should be. He died fine at 7 pm. 21.8 lbs, 11.25 brush for a beard, and 1.25 spurs. Yessirrebob. Edited March 28, 2013 by redbeard Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Turkeygirl Posted March 28, 2013 Report Share Posted March 28, 2013 Congrats Redbeard! Great story and a great turkey! Ya definitely put the hurting on that turkey and some saplings! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
huntn4bucks Posted March 28, 2013 Report Share Posted March 28, 2013 Yeppers...I've been a victim of them there jumpin' trees a time or two myself! Congrats! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ohiobucks Posted March 28, 2013 Report Share Posted March 28, 2013 Attaboy Dean, congrats on your well deserved prize! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
3seasons Posted March 28, 2013 Report Share Posted March 28, 2013 Congrats on a fine bird Dean. Great story too Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
archerjg Posted March 28, 2013 Report Share Posted March 28, 2013 Congratulations on a great bird. Archerjg Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ravin R10 man Posted March 30, 2013 Report Share Posted March 30, 2013 Haaa!.. Redbeard you got a way with words for sure!..good story lol I'm NOT going to ask you what you used to measure the beard with tho....ROFL Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rhino Posted April 1, 2013 Report Share Posted April 1, 2013 Congratulations on #99 Dean. Great bird! Glad to hear from you. Yep I've skinned the bark off a few trees over the years...including 1 this year too. BTW...I limit myself to one cup of coffee in the morning during turkey season so the urge won't hit too often. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WHISKEYSWAMP Posted April 1, 2013 Report Share Posted April 1, 2013 great story and bird... congrats!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dbHunterNY Posted April 3, 2013 Report Share Posted April 3, 2013 another successful story... congrats! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
boomer Posted April 9, 2013 Report Share Posted April 9, 2013 Congrats!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
redbeard Posted April 9, 2013 Author Report Share Posted April 9, 2013 Thanks guys, I tell ya, it's been a 100 and 999 thousand ways to screw up a turkey hunt kinda season for me, which will be the title of a forthcoming book. I've called 9 long beards to the gun, all of 'em gobblin' there heads off and only one has chosen to go to turkey heaven. If it's not one thing, it's another. Yet, I do not complain, it could be worse. Good luck to er'body out there chasing the wary wild turkeebird. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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