popgun Posted September 10, 2005 Report Share Posted September 10, 2005 Educating City Slickers: Sometimes it seems the more educated some city slickers are, the less common sense they have. Today I went out to visit my friend who owns the land where I hunt. His brother-in-law called and told him there was something going on, and that he should check behind the upper pond. We hopped in my mule and off we went. Sure enough there was a new red Avalanche parked in the woods above the upper pond. It was locked up tight and no one was around. We got the license number and called by cell-phone the County Sheriff’s Office. They ran the plate, and the vehicle was not stolen; just trespassing. He said we could call a tow truck and have the vehicle impounded if we wanted. We decided that if the tow truck arrived and the owner showed before he got there, we may be the ones paying for the service run, so we elected not to have it towed. The Sheriff gave us the name and address of the owner and told us that he lived about 45 miles south, but after calling information; we learned he had an unlisted number. We hollered for awhile, but no answer. We drove the mule around and through the woods over a half mile from this vehicle, but still found no one. We went back to the house; picked up a small ice chest with a few cold drinks, and a Street-sweeper, and went back up to the vehicle to wait in the shade. We sat there shooting the breeze for more than two hours and finally the strangest sight appeared through the trees. This guy was a rare sight for an old hillbilly’s eyes. He was wearing a red golf shirt, white short pants, sandals without socks, a hat that looked just like Gilligan’s, and carried the biggest binocular that either of us had ever seen. He was a “Birder”. He said that he had not noticed the purple paint on the fence post, or the posted signs, or the no hunting signs, or the no trespassing signs. Now my buddy is a real character, and calmly told him that he was trespassing, and that all the birds on his land were the same birds as can be seen anywhere else. He told him there were no such things as Ivory Billed Woodpeckers in this neck of the woods, and that the only Bald Eagle and Spotted Owl were eaten years ago, and that they tasted a lot like chicken. He also told him that the only thing up on the ridge were Copperheads and the only wildlife down at the creek were Cottonmouths, and that everyone that lived in the valley had shotguns just like his. He told this guy what a fool he was to be out in the woods in shorts and sandals and that if he did not come down with Lyme Disease that he would be one lucky birder. He told him how close he was to having the truck towed, and that it could have been a long walk, because with a few phone calls, no one in the entire valley would have given a trespasser a ride. Just about the time this guy was getting back into his truck, a dove flew over and my buddy pumped a shell into that Street-sweeper and blew it out of the sky. I was a little surprised myself, because I didn’t know that short barreled shotgun would reach that far. The Birder was more surprised than I was, and I never saw anyone back a truck out of those trees as quick as he did. I don’t think he will be back. We spent the rest of the afternoon sitting on the front porch, drinking the rest of our stash and laughing about the “Birder” from the city. The dove was going to be his supper tonight, but I left before he got it on the grill. ….popgun Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alisha Posted September 10, 2005 Report Share Posted September 10, 2005 Re: Educating City Slickers: Absolutely hilarious! LMAO. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
billygoat Posted September 10, 2005 Report Share Posted September 10, 2005 Re: Educating City Slickers: That is too funny... a birder, used to have to deal with plenty of them when I worked the farm... UW students would come down and tromps through the pastures...! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LifeNRA Posted September 10, 2005 Report Share Posted September 10, 2005 Re: Educating City Slickers: LMBO!!!!! Good one!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BowJoe Posted September 10, 2005 Report Share Posted September 10, 2005 Re: Educating City Slickers: Unfortunately, I hunt one of the best bird watching state parks with a bow only restriction. I don't mind that the park has Monster Bucks but I do mind being told that I am doing something illegal. A few years ago, I had a bird watcher with a pair of oversized binoculars come down a walking trail and spook a doe I already had on the grill. It was early January and the area which I was hunting is also known as "The Restricted" The reason being, is that you can't bowhunt this area until the last 2 weeks of the season and then no one can set foot in the park unless they have been drawn from a lottery held in September. This is something we look forward to every year and to be one of only 90 hunters (30 per 3 days) was an honor. When I told the birder that it wasn't safe or legal for him to be walking in the park at this time, he said that he had more right to be here than any animal killer. I told him that I had a hunting license and park permit to hunt this area. He replied well I hope you fall out of your tree and die and that he was going to pee on my tree. I held up my bow and my quiver with 5 arrows in it and said, "Mr. I have 6 friends up here and they are all faster than you. So I suggest that if you want to keep what you plan to pee with, you should understand that I can shoot fairly well out to 40 yrds and you're standin' at 10." He reported me to the first Park Ranger he saw and they were waiting for me by my truck. When I got there the ranger asked me if I threatened to kill this guy because he was a bird watcher. I said that this guy told me that I was hunting illegally, wished for me to die falling out of my tree and threatened to urinate on my tree. I told the ranger what I had said to the birder and that given the situation where I was being harassed while legally hunting, this guy is the one who should be questioned not me. Fortunately the Ranger agreed and issued a citation and summoned the Conservation officer in the area. The Cons. Off. arrived and issued a court appearence summons for charges of harassing a hunter during the legal taking of a game animal. ROFLMAO. He was fined and charged. Sweet. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Griz Posted September 10, 2005 Report Share Posted September 10, 2005 Re: Educating City Slickers: ROFLMBO... That would have been a site to see right there... When that Dove flew over I would have said, "LOOK" A Yellow Bellyed Sap Sucker..."KABOOM"!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nut Posted September 10, 2005 Report Share Posted September 10, 2005 Re: Educating City Slickers: Good stories Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest outdoorgirl Posted September 10, 2005 Report Share Posted September 10, 2005 Re: Educating City Slickers: Popgun .....thanks for the chuckle.....i was wondering what a street sweeper was....lol.....till he killed the dove....don't you just hate trespassers..that guy must off thought you guys were nuts....lol Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
archerjg Posted September 11, 2005 Report Share Posted September 11, 2005 Re: Educating City Slickers: That is one way to get rid of a trespasser. Hope the dove was good. Archerjg Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dg Posted September 11, 2005 Report Share Posted September 11, 2005 Re: Educating City Slickers: You let the DA go to easy! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stevebeilgard Posted September 11, 2005 Report Share Posted September 11, 2005 Re: Educating City Slickers: i love a happy ending.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest bowhunterforlife Posted September 11, 2005 Report Share Posted September 11, 2005 Re: Educating City Slickers: i always love to hear the good stories about people trying the love of hunters and LOSING Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wtnhunt Posted September 11, 2005 Report Share Posted September 11, 2005 Re: Educating City Slickers: LMBO. That is funny. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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