Guest Andrea Posted March 9, 2006 Report Share Posted March 9, 2006 Just heard about this on the news. Thought I'd throw it out there for you guys to debate. Suppose an unmarried man gets his girlfriend or "one night stand" pregnant. She wants the baby and he DOES NOT. Should he have to pay child support for the baby he never wanted????? This is a new law being proposed in Michigan. It has been nicknamed "Roe v. Wade for Men". Here's the whole story: Men's rights Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gator Posted March 9, 2006 Report Share Posted March 9, 2006 Re: Should men have to pay? Hmmmmmm, That is a good point. I dunno, with the options out there today for birth control for women, I say no. There would be exceptions of course, but in the case of the man they refernce in the article........I say no. I also feel that sometimes women will use a pregnancy as a form of "entrapment"........... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
M00N Posted March 9, 2006 Report Share Posted March 9, 2006 Re: Should men have to pay? My opinion on the matter is if both partners are not ready to accept the responsibility of the fact that accidental pregnancies can happen; then they should not be having sex in the first place. Most of the forms of birth control don’t work 100% at preventing pregnancies. The only forms that would be extremely effective at preventing pregnancies are abstinence and sterilization. As an adult, which is consenting in sex, it is your responsibility to realize if an accidental pregnancy happens you have to deal with the consequences of your actions. If the father of the child does not wish to be a father to his child that he helped make, then he should at least have to help provide funds for the mother to take care of the child. At least until she finds a true father for her child and offers the blood father to sign his parental rights over to the new father. You cannot simply just erase your mistakes and not deal with them or walk away from them with no consequences to your actions. That would be like someone killing a person, and then saying “oops sorry”, then wanting to walk away back to a normal life, never dealing with their actions in any way. The only exception to this I could see is if the woman did something to help herself become pregnant. Along the lines of skipping her birth control pills and not informing her partner, damaging the condom with intentions of them failing, or lying saying she had a hysterectomy when she didn’t. Rape would also along the same lines. In those cases I could see the father having the option to not be any part of his child’s life and not having to pay child support either. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tominator Posted March 9, 2006 Report Share Posted March 9, 2006 Re: Should men have to pay? If you play, you pay. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Texan_Til_I_Die Posted March 9, 2006 Report Share Posted March 9, 2006 Re: Should men have to pay? [ QUOTE ] If you play, you pay. [/ QUOTE ] Good answer! If you father (or mother) a child, you should be financially responsible regardless of whether or not you choose to be involved with the raising of the child. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
johnf Posted March 9, 2006 Report Share Posted March 9, 2006 Re: Should men have to pay? So lets turn this a little. If a man rapes a girl and she gets pregnant and keeps the baby does he have to pay childsupport, if so does he get visitation rights. Or should he pay "damages" including the cost of raising the child and get no parental rights. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Andrea Posted March 9, 2006 Report Share Posted March 9, 2006 Re: Should men have to pay? What gator said about entrapment reminded me of something. I think it's wrong for a woman to entrap a man with a pregnancy. But I knew a girl who got married to a guy that said he wanted to have kids with her. They tried for years. She even had fertility tests done on herself. Come to find out..........he had a vasectomy during his previous marriage and never told her about it. Now THAT is WRONG!!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WaCoyote Posted March 9, 2006 Report Share Posted March 9, 2006 Re: Should men have to pay? Absolutely. If he's that irresponsible heck yeah he should pay. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Reloader Posted March 9, 2006 Report Share Posted March 9, 2006 Re: Should men have to pay? [ QUOTE ] What gator said about entrapment reminded me of something. I think it's wrong for a woman to entrap a man with a pregnancy. But I knew a girl who got married to a guy that said he wanted to have kids with her. They tried for years. She even had fertility tests done on herself. Come to find out..........he had a vasectomy during his previous marriage and never told her about it. Now THAT is WRONG!!!!! [/ QUOTE ] That is just plain wrong! as to the orriginal topic...jsut to play devils advocate... No, men should NOT be required to pay child suport, he should be responsable for half of the option he wants to pick...If the woman has a choice to get out of her responsability then so should he. My actualy opinion...They both need to pay, keep the pregnancy and then choose between adoption or raising the kid. He should pay child support or a portion of the adoption process costs. Here is a new question...What if the guy wants to keep keep the child and the mother wants to abort? Should she have to pay pain and suffering to him for killing his child? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Texan_Til_I_Die Posted March 9, 2006 Report Share Posted March 9, 2006 Re: Should men have to pay? [ QUOTE ] So lets turn this a little. If a man rapes a girl and she gets pregnant and keeps the baby does he have to pay childsupport, if so does he get visitation rights. Or should he pay "damages" including the cost of raising the child and get no parental rights. [/ QUOTE ] I don't think he'd be able to do either one if he were where he belonged - IN JAIL!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest AllArmyoutdoorsSD Posted March 9, 2006 Report Share Posted March 9, 2006 Re: Should men have to pay? I agree that both parties involved indeed should be responsible. However until men are looked at equally as viable parents, how can they be expected to to do their share. ie. durring my divorce I faught for custody of my daughter, I was the nuturer, I got up in the middle of the night, when she hurts herself it is daddy she wants etc. I have been the main parent to her, yet because I am a man I am looked down upon, and now must pay an insane amount of money to her mother, who by the way seees Jaimye less than I do at this point. I may be bitter and I do know of a few guys who were able to gain custody of their children, but not in this state and not without the mother just handing the children over. I am not complaining about the child support, I just don't see how my ex is doing her share, She goes to work at 1200 and gets home around 930, Jaimye waikes up around 930 in the morning so she sees her mother for a couple hours of the morning while she gets ready for work. I generally pick Jaimye up at school and take her to day care, then I pick her up at least two nights a week and she stays with me, further more I have Jaimye every weekend friday through Monday Morning. I truly enjoy the time I have with my daughter, I wouldn't change that at all. I just feel that sometimes we as men are having to take a little more responsibilty than the fairer sex.JMO Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Andrea Posted March 9, 2006 Report Share Posted March 9, 2006 Re: Should men have to pay? "Here is a new question...What if the guy wants to keep keep the child and the mother wants to abort? Should she have to pay pain and suffering to him for killing his child?" Good point. Yeah....I think she should. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
M00N Posted March 9, 2006 Report Share Posted March 9, 2006 Re: Should men have to pay? [ QUOTE ] "Here is a new question...What if the guy wants to keep keep the child and the mother wants to abort? Should she have to pay pain and suffering to him for killing his child?" Good point. Yeah....I think she should. [/ QUOTE ] Yes, she should have to pay pain and suffering for aborting his child, or she should have to pay the equivalent for 18 years of child support. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest AllArmyoutdoorsSD Posted March 9, 2006 Report Share Posted March 9, 2006 Re: Should men have to pay? If the father of the child wants to keep the baby, by todays laws the mother can still do what ever she feels right, his concerns are not even concidered, Worse yet if she decides to abort guess who can be taken to court and made to pay at least half of the cost. IMO the man should beable to keep the child or at least adopt after birth. As far as the mother paying, it would be nice, but I am not going to hold my breath on that one. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Andrea Posted March 9, 2006 Report Share Posted March 9, 2006 Re: Should men have to pay? [ QUOTE ] I agree that both parties involved indeed should be responsible. However until men are looked at equally as viable parents, how can they be expected to to do their share. ie. durring my divorce I faught for custody of my daughter, I was the nuturer, I got up in the middle of the night, when she hurts herself it is daddy she wants etc. I have been the main parent to her, yet because I am a man I am looked down upon, and now must pay an insane amount of money to her mother, who by the way seees Jaimye less than I do at this point. I may be bitter and I do know of a few guys who were able to gain custody of their children, but not in this state and not without the mother just handing the children over. I am not complaining about the child support, I just don't see how my ex is doing her share, She goes to work at 1200 and gets home around 930, Jaimye waikes up around 930 in the morning so she sees her mother for a couple hours of the morning while she gets ready for work. I generally pick Jaimye up at school and take her to day care, then I pick her up at least two nights a week and she stays with me, further more I have Jaimye every weekend friday through Monday Morning. I truly enjoy the time I have with my daughter, I wouldn't change that at all. I just feel that sometimes we as men are having to take a little more responsibilty than the fairer sex.JMO [/ QUOTE ] I agree that men are on the short end of the stick here. And each situation is different. But if it can be proven that the father is the main provider of care, affection, time and virtually all the basic needs then he should be granted custody. ( Provided that he is not abusive or involved in criminal actions) I know of quite a few women that probably shouldn't have custody of their children and the fathers should. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HuntingInMaine Posted March 9, 2006 Report Share Posted March 9, 2006 Re: Should men have to pay? Yes, he should have to pay for the baby. If he didn't want the child, he shouldn't have slept with the woman. The woman isn't the only one that should be responsible for birth control. If he is dead set against having a child, he should bring along his own birth control and not rely on the woman to remember her pill or whatever she uses. The question about the man wanting the baby and the woman wanting an abortion is a very thought provoking one. For things to be entirely fair (as it should be!) the woman should follow through with the pregnancy and turn the baby over to the father after birth. She should then be responsible for paying child support. If a man rapes a woman and a child is conceived, he should pay support, but not directly to the victim, it should go through the state so he can't locate her. He's already proven himself an unfit human being, there shouldn't be any question that he would NOT make a good father. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Andrea Posted March 9, 2006 Report Share Posted March 9, 2006 Re: Should men have to pay? [ QUOTE ] Yes, he should have to pay for the baby. If he didn't want the child, he shouldn't have slept with the woman. The woman isn't the only one that should be responsible for birth control. If he is dead set against having a child, he should bring along his own birth control and not rely on the woman to remember her pill or whatever she uses. The question about the man wanting the baby and the woman wanting an abortion is a very thought provoking one. For things to be entirely fair (as it should be!) the woman should follow through with the pregnancy and turn the baby over to the father after birth. She should then be responsible for paying child support. If a man rapes a woman and a child is conceived, he should pay support, but not directly to the victim, it should go through the state so he can't locate her. He's already proven himself an unfit human being, there shouldn't be any question that he would NOT make a good father. [/ QUOTE ] LOL.........Linda--if he raped a woman he shouldn't even be ALIVE. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HuntingInMaine Posted March 9, 2006 Report Share Posted March 9, 2006 Re: Should men have to pay? [ QUOTE ] LOL.........Linda--if he raped a woman he shouldn't even be ALIVE [/ QUOTE ] I agree wholeheartedly, but they haven't passed that law....yet! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
carbonhunter Posted March 9, 2006 Report Share Posted March 9, 2006 Re: Should men have to pay? [ QUOTE ] If you play, you pay. [/ QUOTE ] Good point, but how about this, I know of a case here in Phx where a girl did the title work for a well know celeb. here in the valley, after the job was done she walked over to my roomate and told her that she was going to fry this guy. She took him out for drinks then took him back to her apartment. After the act was done and a couple of weeks had gone by she went for the coup-de-grace, on speaker phone she called the guy and told him she was pregnet (she wasnt) and needed 80,000 grand for the abortion and to keep hush about it. Week later she took a three weeks off for a little vacation to mexico. I think u should be willing to fess up for your deeds, but too many women see a pregnacy as $$$$ anymore. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
buckee Posted March 9, 2006 Report Share Posted March 9, 2006 Re: Should men have to pay? [ QUOTE ] [ QUOTE ] LOL.........Linda--if he raped a woman he shouldn't even be ALIVE [/ QUOTE ] I agree wholeheartedly, but they haven't passed that law....yet! [/ QUOTE ] Castration and Prison sounds good Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wtnhunt Posted March 9, 2006 Report Share Posted March 9, 2006 Re: Should men have to pay? [ QUOTE ] [ QUOTE ] So lets turn this a little. If a man rapes a girl and she gets pregnant and keeps the baby does he have to pay childsupport, if so does he get visitation rights. Or should he pay "damages" including the cost of raising the child and get no parental rights. [/ QUOTE ] I don't think he'd be able to do either one if he were where he belonged - IN JAIL!!! [/ QUOTE ] I agree, but think in rape cases he belongs under the jail, but realistically those guilty of rape even though while in jail he should pay for everything he can, take all his money. As for the consenting adults who had premarital or extramarital sex, shame on both of them, havent they been reading these forums, LOL. Yes he should have to pay even though he may not want the kid and may never have any visitation rights, he should step up and take on that responsibility. If your gonna play, you need to be prepared to pay PERIOD. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WI2506 Posted March 10, 2006 Report Share Posted March 10, 2006 Re: Should men have to pay? was he raped? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
unioncountyslayer Posted March 10, 2006 Report Share Posted March 10, 2006 Re: Should men have to pay? I say that you know what the result of sex is, and weather you want the baby or not, it's the responsibility of both parties. If the guy didn't want a baby he should have kept his zipper closed. JMHO Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DSGB Posted March 10, 2006 Report Share Posted March 10, 2006 Re: Should men have to pay? [ QUOTE ] My opinion on the matter is if both partners are not ready to accept the responsibility of the fact that accidental pregnancies can happen; then they should not be having sex in the first place. [/ QUOTE ] Bingo! Gotta pay to play! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Canadian_Goose Posted March 10, 2006 Report Share Posted March 10, 2006 Re: Should men have to pay? The guy has to take responsibility too. I too think we have the short end of the stick fellas. But god knows if that ever happened to me (custody issues) i would fight tooth and nail for my currently non-exisstant kids. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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