buckee Posted March 10, 2006 Report Share Posted March 10, 2006 Another one from OJR. I wish he'd post these priceless Gems himself The Guys' Rules At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down Finally, the guys' side of the story. (I must admit, it's pretty good.) We always hear "the rules" From the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side. These are our rules! Please note.. these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE! ___________________________________ 1. Men ARE not mind readers. 1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down. 1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be. 1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it that way. 1. Crying is blackmail. 1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it! 1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every question. 1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for. 1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor. 1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days. 1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one . 1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself. 1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials. 1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we. 1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is. 1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that. 1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle. 1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear. 1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is fine... Really. 1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf. 1. You have enough clothes. 1. You have too many shoes. 1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape! 1. Thank you for reading this. Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight; but did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping. Pass this on to as many men as you can, to give them a laugh. Pass this on to as many women as you can and give them an even bigger laugh. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JJL Posted March 10, 2006 Report Share Posted March 10, 2006 Re: MEN\'S RULES You forgot rule #1............... Yes dear you wear the pants in the family, but I have the belt. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
007hunter Posted March 10, 2006 Report Share Posted March 10, 2006 Re: MEN\'S RULES I liked rule #1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dakota Posted March 10, 2006 Report Share Posted March 10, 2006 Re: MEN\'S RULES AMEN!!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BIG_BUCK_1 Posted March 10, 2006 Report Share Posted March 10, 2006 Re: MEN\'S RULES lol Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
toddyboman Posted March 10, 2006 Report Share Posted March 10, 2006 Re: MEN\'S RULES LMAO!! Thats great. I think I will print it and post it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bruce Schmeck Posted March 10, 2006 Report Share Posted March 10, 2006 Re: MEN\'S RULES Priceless! I sure do miss ol' OJR his wisdom is unimpeachable. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shaun_300 Posted March 10, 2006 Report Share Posted March 10, 2006 Re: MEN\'S RULES LOL! Good 'ol OJR... I sure wish he'd come back on here! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wtnhunt Posted March 10, 2006 Report Share Posted March 10, 2006 Re: MEN\'S RULES Those are great. Think Orlan himself posted those in here back a couple years ago. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Clay008 Posted March 10, 2006 Report Share Posted March 10, 2006 Re: MEN\'S RULES lol That is a great set of rules. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tominator Posted March 10, 2006 Report Share Posted March 10, 2006 Re: MEN\'S RULES I'm betting Orlan will get over his silly beef and come back. I think he's a bigger person than he thinks he is. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Canadian_Goose Posted March 10, 2006 Report Share Posted March 10, 2006 Re: MEN\'S RULES the rules failed to address hunting... maybe we have to ammend them or add to them? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cutter Posted March 10, 2006 Report Share Posted March 10, 2006 Re: MEN\'S RULES @#*! YAH!!!! LMAO. Great stuff. Thanks for sharing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jeramie Posted March 10, 2006 Report Share Posted March 10, 2006 Re: MEN\'S RULES I just emailed those to my wife... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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