Scrubmasters theme song!


MCH

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Well, its been a while since my last attempt at musical satire. And since lil has resorted to digging up year old poems, I thought I would give my readers another installment.

I started this one back 6 months or go, but quickly got tired of it. Today, I have revived it.

It parodies Sir Mix-a-lot's "Baby Got Back". It is more of a song for the younger generation but the older readers might remember it while watching "Shrek" with their kid.(end of show, donkey singing about dragon)

Also, I thought I would simultaneously apply for the job of Head of Public Relations for the Scrubmasters.

Well, here it goes:

Can't Eat the Rack

***talking***

Oh my God,

Buckee, look at that buck!

It's so weird!

It looks like one of them mutated deer or something.

You ever seen a rack like that?

Now, that's a non-typical if I've ever seen one!

I mean....that rack......

It's just so......ugly.

I can't believe how small it is.

It's just not all there.

I mean......it's a scrub.

Hold on, I'm gonna shoot it!!

***rapping***

I like scrub bucks and I cannot lie.

You other hunters can't deny.

When a buck walks up with a itty bitty rack

or a tumor on its back

You get sprung.

Wanna take the shot.

Cuz you noticed that buck is hot!

Deep in the velvet it's wearing,

You're hooked and you can't stop staring.

"Oh, Baby, I wanna getcha,

And take our picture.

My buddies tried to warn me,

They say that rack you've got

Ain't so horny!

Oooh, Mr. Buckskin,

You say you wanna get in my fridge?

Well, stand still, stand still....Give me a shot and you will!

I've seen you rubbing,

Now, I'm thinking about grubbing."

Sweat, Sweat, Got me going like a turbo vet.

I'm tired of magazines,

saying Big Bucks are the thing.

Take an average hunter and ask him that...

"You can't eat the rack!!!"

Fellas(yeah) Fellas(yeah)

Did your last buck sport a big rack?

Well, shake it, shake it, bake it......bake that scrubby buck.

Can't eat the rack!

(Scrub buck rack with a big buck booty)

I like em small and tender,

Don't care what gender.

I just can't help myself,

I'm acting like an animal,

Now here's my scandal:

I wanna get you home,

and, Uh, cut you up, Uh Uh.

I ain't talking about P an Y,

It's bake or grilled or fried!

I like em real thick and juicy

So give me that juicy steak,

And a potato that's half baked,

Beggin for a piece of cake.

So I'm looking at hunting videos,

Big time hunters, drawing their bows....

They can have their big bucks,

I'll keep my forks and does.

A word to the small racked bucks,

I want you in my truck.

But I gotta be straight when I say....I wanna eat....

Til the break of dawn.....

A lot of trophy hunters won't like this song,

Cuz them boys like racks that are stacked.

But I'd shoot a scrub with a nub.

Cuz I'm starving and carving...

And down to get my grubbing on!!

So scrubbies(yeah) scrubbies(yeah)

If ya wanna land in my plate,

Then come around,

Flaunt what ya got,

Even Scott Hughes would take the shot.

Can't eat the rack!

Yeah, baby,

When it comes to bucks,

MB ten ain't got nothing to do with my selection.

12 points, 170 P&Y????

Only if it's got a 10lb backstrap!!!!!

So your buddy got a big buck,

Horns sticking out of his truck,

Well, his truck better be full of ducks, cause if he's hungry, he's out of luck.

My aching tummy just wants some......ten..der...ven..is...on.

You can tenderize and pound.......boil for days on end.

Some hunters wanna tell you that old bucks.....

Taste just as good as a scrub.

So they pound it, and beat it,

then make jerky just to eat it!

Some say jerky's where its at.

Well, I ain't down with that!

Cuz ham's are good and shoulders are kicking,

and tenderloin's fingerlicking!

To the beanpole writer's in the magazines,

Big Bucks ain't the thing!

Give me scrub with a nub,

And I won't have to beat it with a club.

Some trophy hunters tried to refute,

this knowledge I'm giving you.

He saw big bucks and chose to shoot em,

Now he's starving cause he can't chew em!!!

So hunters if a scrub looks good,

and you wanna strap it across your hood,

Dial 1-900-Scrubmasters and we'll come help you cook!!!

CAN'T EAT THE RACK!!!!!

All right scrubmasters......put out the lighters before you burn down your trailers!!

[ 10-10-2002, 09:39 PM: Message edited by: mccurtaincountyhunter ]

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Re: Scrubmasters theme song!

[email protected] man, I'm almost crying I'm laughing so hard.........nothing like a little Sir-Scrub-Alot to get you pumped up !! grin.gif

I might be 34, but there are still the first 2 SMA tapes in my hunting rig....one is so beat up, I don't know how it plays anymore....but they are "must plays" when me and my buddy head out early in the morning for a day of hunting......... wink.gif

[ 10-10-2002, 10:06 PM: Message edited by: iminrut ]

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  • 2 weeks later...
  • 1 year later...

Re: Scrubmasters theme song!

you went digging for that one---thanks for bringing it back out---enjoyed it just as much as the first time I "sang" it!

I tried calling the 1-900 # and I got a recording--it sounded like Tony's voice. He said they are temporarily closed----something about him getting beat on 3D by an 18 year old shooting a Mathews. He sounded kind of depressed grin.gifgrin.gif Guess he's out retuning that hoyt grin.gif

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Re: Scrubmasters theme song!

[ QUOTE ]

I tried calling the 1-900 # and I got a recording--it sounded like Tony's voice. He said they are temporarily closed----something about him getting beat on 3D by an 18 year old shooting a Mathews. He sounded kind of depressed grin.gifgrin.gif Guess he's out retuning that hoyt grin.gif

[/ QUOTE ]

LMBO! That was almost as funny as the song! grin.gif

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