The Rules of Rural IL!!


Bowtech_archer07

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1. Pull your droopy pants up. You look like an idiot.

2. Turn your cap right, your head isn't crooked.

3. Let's get this straight; it's called a "dirt road." I drive a pickup truck

because I want to. No matter how slow you drive, you're going to get

dust on your Lexus. Drive it or get out of the way.

4. They are cattle They're live steaks . That's why they smell funny to you.

But they smell like money to us. Get over it. Don't like it? Rt 24 goes

east and west, I-57 goes north and south. Pick one.

5. So you have a $60,000 car. We're impressed. We have $250,000

combines and hay balers that are driven only 3 weeks a year.

6. So every person in ILLINOIS waves. It's called being friendly. Try to

understand the concept.

7. If that cell phone rings while an 8-point buck and 3 does are coming

in, we WILL shoot it out of your hand. You better hope you don't have

it up to your ear at the time.

8. Yeah, we eat taters & gravy, beans & cornbread. You really want sushi

& caviar? It's available at the corner bait shop.

9. The "Opener" refers to the first day of deer season. It's a religious

holiday held the closest Saturday to the first of November.

10. We open doors for women. That is applied to all women, regardless of

age.

11. No, there's no "vegetarian special" on the menu. Order steak. Or you

can order the Chef's Salad and pick off the 2 pounds of ham & turkey.

12. When we fill out a table, there are three main dishes: meats,

vegetables, and breads. We use three spices: salt, pepper, and

ketchup. Oh, yeah.... We don't care what you folks in Cincinnati call

that stuff you eat... IT AIN'T REAL CHILI!!

13. You bring "coke" into my house, it better be brown, wet and served

over ice.

14. You bring "Mary Jane" into my house, she better be cute, know how to

shoot, drive a truck, and have long hair.

15. College and High School Football is as important here as the Lakers

and the Knicks, and a dang site more fun to watch.

16. Yeah, we have golf courses. But don't hit the water hazards -- it

spooks the fish.

17. Colleges? We have them all over. We have State Universities,

Community Colleges, and Vo-techs. They come outta there with an

education plus a love for God and country, and they still wave at

everybody when they come for the holidays.

18. We have a whole ton of folks in the Army, Navy, Air Force, and

Marines. So don't mess with us. If you do, you will get whipped by the

best.

19. Turn down that blasted car stereo! That thumpity-thump crap ain't

music, anyway. We don't want to hear it anymore than we want to see

your boxers. Refer back to #1.

20. 4 inches isn't a blizzard - it's a flurry. Drive like you got some sense in

it, and DON'T take all our bread, milk, and bleach from the grocery

stores. This ain't Alaska, worst case, you may have to live a whole day

without croissants. The pickups with snow blades will have you out the

next day.

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LOL thats pretty funny!!

Ya know if all of yall Illinois folks would follow them rules us Packer fans may be a bit more friendly at the Packer/Bear games... well probably not, but i bet we wouldnt yell and gesture as much when we see ' land of Lincoln' goin down our highways :D:p

Not a Bears fan!! Can't blame me!!!:p:p:D:D

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Well see, what most folks don't know is that Illinois is actually two states that go by two different names. There's Southern Illinois and then there's the State of Chicago. Here in So IL, we live by most of those rules and respect our fellow man or woman. In the State of Chicago, they take all of the money that the people of So IL work hard for and blow it on people that don't work and complain about not getting enough money for doing absolutely nothing and how their kids aren't getting a good enough education because they don't have enough money from So IL. I think the people from the Late State of Chicago are the people that Cheddar-Heads are gripin' about. We like it down here and try not to go north any more than we have to.

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Well see, what most folks don't know is that Illinois is actually two states that go by two different names. There's Southern Illinois and then there's the State of Chicago. Here in So IL, we live by most of those rules and respect our fellow man or woman. In the State of Chicago, they take all of the money that the people of So IL work hard for and blow it on people that don't work and complain about not getting enough money for doing absolutely nothing and how their kids aren't getting a good enough education because they don't have enough money from So IL. I think the people from the Late State of Chicago are the people that Cheddar-Heads are gripin' about. We like it down here and try not to go north any more than we have to.

I agree 100%!! LOL

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Well see, what most folks don't know is that Illinois is actually two states that go by two different names. There's Southern Illinois and then there's the State of Chicago. Here in So IL, we live by most of those rules and respect our fellow man or woman. In the State of Chicago, they take all of the money that the people of So IL work hard for and blow it on people that don't work and complain about not getting enough money for doing absolutely nothing and how their kids aren't getting a good enough education because they don't have enough money from So IL. I think the people from the Late State of Chicago are the people that Cheddar-Heads are gripin' about. We like it down here and try not to go north any more than we have to.

Think we could send Madison and Milwaukee down to ya and redefine the border up here too? The 51st state.........we'll call it Disarray:eek::D

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Well see, what most folks don't know is that Illinois is actually two states that go by two different names. There's Southern Illinois and then there's the State of Chicago. Here in So IL, we live by most of those rules and respect our fellow man or woman. In the State of Chicago, they take all of the money that the people of So IL work hard for and blow it on people that don't work and complain about not getting enough money for doing absolutely nothing and how their kids aren't getting a good enough education because they don't have enough money from So IL. I think the people from the Late State of Chicago are the people that Cheddar-Heads are gripin' about. We like it down here and try not to go north any more than we have to.
Exactly! With all due respect, Wisconsin and Chicago are one in the same and should have been one back when these states were created. If Chicago were in Wisconsin, there would only be one state without concealed carry legislation (that would be Wisconsin btw...;) )

So Wisconsin, how much can we pay you to take Chicago and it's citizens off Illinois hands? :D

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excuse me but is so.illinois and aroostock county here in northern maine in anyway possible related,cuz seems to me we have them there same rules.I love when i go out my door on a nice summer night and can hear the moo of the neighbors cows,we love to dust the lexus out while it tries to keep the dust down,we wear belts and our pants fit,our hats are on straight,we only run our 250,000 potatoe harvesters for 3 wks a yr and our combines even less,our local steak house is not texas road house(no offense)it's grammy's country inn,our nearest sushi shop is called macs trading post,we don't play music load in our vehicles cuz it will scare away the deer,our lakes in the winter are like little villages,and we to support another part of our state in which would be southern maine.So brother maybe one of us will host another to hunt either one of our big deer,come on up i got a beautiful camp and good huntin 200lb plus deer.

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