NS whitetail Posted January 26, 2010 Report Share Posted January 26, 2010 On last Friday, I had my 13 year old daughter to her dentist getting her retainer. While she was in his office, he started to put some questions to her. ( this dentist is also my ex-wife's dentist, Megan's mother ). I have been divorced from her almost 10 years, and as some of you know, I won custody of Megan back in Oct of 2009. It is what she wanted, to live with me fulltime. Before that, Megan always spent at least 50 % of the time here but her mother always had the control and always tried to cause problems. Anyway, the dentist started out by saying ............. "Don't tell anyone because you might get me in trouble." He then started to ask her : So, you live with your father now, how is that working for you, are you good with it, is everything ok there ? How often to you go and see your Mom ? So, how long have your mother and father been split up ? This has been really working on my mind every since, I feel that he was way out of line and that maybe since my ex goes to him ( pretty hard to tell what that nutcase has told him ) that he was asking questions for her and am considering calling him and telling him that I am not pleased. He is a dentist not a child therapist. Megan also said that it made her feel uncomfortable. Do any of you think he was out of line ? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cinch314 Posted January 26, 2010 Report Share Posted January 26, 2010 In my opinion he was out of line and not being professional at all. Those are questions for outside of a professional office and shouldnt be asked by someone that has no right to ask them, especially if it makes the child feel uncomfortable. But then again that is my opinion. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Slugger Posted January 26, 2010 Report Share Posted January 26, 2010 Out of line!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jeramie Posted January 26, 2010 Report Share Posted January 26, 2010 Yeah, that was out of line. It would be different if he asked you those questions but that is something he probably shoudnt be asking a child. You may over reading it a little bit, he may actually be curious but still it was a little out of line. I would just ask him to keep it professional because he made your daughter feel awkward. Then feel him out. Im guessing he will start talking and you wont look like the bad guy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dawg Posted January 26, 2010 Report Share Posted January 26, 2010 He is a dentist not a child therapist. Megan also said that it made her feel uncomfortable. Do any of you think he was out of line ? Yep, you hit the nail on the head right there. I'd file a complaint. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hammerforged Posted January 26, 2010 Report Share Posted January 26, 2010 :jaw:Most definitely out of line and he knew it or he wouldn't have started the conversation the way he did! I think I would find a new dentist pronto! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RangerClay Posted January 26, 2010 Report Share Posted January 26, 2010 I would have a little chat with this dentist and then I would report him to whatever authority oversee's them. I know you are on an Island but I think its time to find a new dentist ASAP. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
92xj Posted January 26, 2010 Report Share Posted January 26, 2010 Megan also said that it made her feel uncomfortable. I do not have any kids so I can not say from personal experience what i would do, but i do know one thing. If I told my parents that I was uncomfortable around someone, I would expect them to make a change of some sort. At the very least not make me be around that person, ever. I believe that if I was in your shoes, something would be done and done quickly. I would first cut all relations with this dentist to my child. Second there would be some sort of legal action. I would not seek any money or sue, I am just not that type of person, but I would seek penalties on this dentist. I don't know what they would be or what could happen, but I would sure make him aware that messing with me and my child in a manner that he is not suppose to is wrong on all counts. You seem like a good guy with his head on his shoulders the correct way. You know inside what needs to happen. I wish you the best with your decisions. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tominator Posted January 26, 2010 Report Share Posted January 26, 2010 He is a dentist not a child therapist. Megan also said that it made her feel uncomfortable. Exactly. Do any of you think he was out of line ? WAAAAY out of line. I'd confront him with it, and then I think I'd be looking for a new dentist. He's got some audacity. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
buckee Posted January 26, 2010 Report Share Posted January 26, 2010 You are absolutely right in your thinking Lewis. He is a dentist not a child therapist and had no right (and he knows it too) to question your daughter like that. How dare he. I'd be livid buddy and if it was me, I'd be down there giving him a piece of my mind. You have more than every right to be ticked off.:yes: PS - Of course, I wouldn't give him too big of a piece of my mind, or I wouldn't have any left for myself..eh ..LOL Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camoman1 Posted January 26, 2010 Report Share Posted January 26, 2010 :jaw:Most definitely out of line and he knew it or he wouldn't have started the conversation the way he did! I think I would find a new dentist pronto! Yep! He knew that he shouldnt be talking to your daughter about that stuff, but did anyways. I would not be too amused about this. I think you should either find another dentist, or if thats not really an option, tell him to keep his conversations to appropriate things. Either way, I think a phone call to him is a good idea. That seems odd that he would initiate that kind of talk without someone (ex??) pushing him along. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RangerClay Posted January 26, 2010 Report Share Posted January 26, 2010 Do dentists make good lobster bait? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NS whitetail Posted January 26, 2010 Author Report Share Posted January 26, 2010 I would have a little chat with this dentist and then I would report him to whatever authority oversee's them. I know you are on an Island but I think its time to find a new dentist ASAP. I am changing her dentist ( there are 8 others in the same building ), and yes I'm on an island, but we are connnected to the mainland with a mile long causeway ...... so we're not isolated Thanks for all the opinions :cool2: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Newarcher Posted January 26, 2010 Report Share Posted January 26, 2010 (edited) New dentist....check. Confrontation....double check. Here's an angle no one else mentioned....sometimes predators test their proposed victims by asking something like this to see if their intended victim will 'tell'. If they do not 'tell' then the next time they put the moves on. You NEVER hear a parent say "well, I knew he would molest my child but took my child there anyway". It is always "you know, I trusted him completely and never knew there was a problem". It may have been just diarrhea of the mouth on his part and nothing to it but that dude is never seeing my child again. Best case: diarrhea of the mouth Most likely case: ex said something that made him have a concern and he was trying to play detective--in any even inappropriate. Worst case: future predator testing your daughter's character to see if she's the proper victim. Make sure you PRAISE your daughter, you have a good one there. I would personally keep any confrontation to yourself lest your daughter think twice about telling you next time for fear of getting a boyfriend, friend, relative in trouble. New Edited January 26, 2010 by Newarcher Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
muzzy1 Posted January 26, 2010 Report Share Posted January 26, 2010 Way out of line..I would find a new dentist fast.I would also have a little one on one talk with him to find out where this is comming from. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
woolybear Posted January 26, 2010 Report Share Posted January 26, 2010 Aint no way I'd put up with his secret prodding into family affairs. Definately make him aware you know of the questioning and he's fortunate you don't make him his own client looking for a new set of toofers.:boxing: WAY out of line. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DocMort Posted January 26, 2010 Report Share Posted January 26, 2010 1. Find a new dentist 2. Have a one on one non-confrontational ( unless he makes it other wise) 3. Report him right on up 4. If none of this works. Well A one on one that is escalated could be called for. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DocMort Posted January 26, 2010 Report Share Posted January 26, 2010 Ohhh OHH and do it right away. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RangerClay Posted January 26, 2010 Report Share Posted January 26, 2010 Anyway, the dentist started out by saying ............. "Don't tell anyone because you might get me in trouble." He knew what he was doing was wrong. Is there a chance that your ex is in bed (literally) with this guy? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NS whitetail Posted January 26, 2010 Author Report Share Posted January 26, 2010 Anyway, the dentist started out by saying ............. "Don't tell anyone because you might get me in trouble." He knew what he was doing was wrong. Is there a chance that your ex is in bed (literally) with this guy? I don't think so .............. even he wouldn't be that hard up :D I called his office ( 45 minute drive away ) , told the receptionist to tell him to call me back when he gets back from lunch............... waiting now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.