Dentist update.

[NS whitetail]

The dentist just called me back and gave me a big apology.

Before I got custody ( we had before and still have joint-custody but now I have the day to day control) of Megan, her mother, since she had the day to day control as it is called, was the one who took her to most of her appointments ( cleanings, check-ups, and she had braces ). Megan got her braces off last Oct and I have been the one taking her to the appointments and got all the paper work and such changed over to my name. I told the receptionist the reason of the change.

The dentist excuse for the questions was this :

He said, he noticed the change of who was bringing Megan to her appointments and noticed the change on the billing but was not sure what was going on and needed to know because of legal matters and what not of who had the say in what could be done to Megan' teeth. He said that he has had cases before where someone told him to do work to a child and a few days later, got a call from the other parent flying into him.

I told him that he could have asked me or her mother or the receptionist and that he was out of line. He agreed, but he is a smooth talker and pretty much like a weasel and kept making excuses.

Anyway ................. I kept my calm, was somewhat nice about the matter and excepted his apology.

Thanks for all the opinions.

[92xj]

Sounds like he was trying to back pedal a little bit. If the option is there I would still find another. If not, you should feel that you have done the correct thing and next time you take Megan you need to bring a chair in the room and sit right beside her and the dentist. Just sit there, stare at him and never say a word.

[camoman1]

I guess what he is saying about the 'who can give him the ok to do work on her teeth' is legit. But from the questions that you said he asked your daughter, that doesnt seem like the case.

And your are right about him asking you, or the receptionist.

Whether he is up to something or really meant nothing more than small talk...he made your daughter feel uncomfortable and thats all that really matters. Now he knows that you know what he said, and thats good.

[RangerClay]

Again,

Anyway, the dentist started out by saying ............. "Don't tell anyone because you might get me in trouble."

This sentence says it all. He knew what he was doing was wrong.

I would still have her see another dentist if I were you.

[Slugger]

I would be shopping for a new dentist!

[Newarcher]

Nope, not buying it. He was either fishing for information or he was fishing for a victim.

In either event, he would be done as my daughter's dentist. If I am going to have to choose between not seeing a dentist and guaranteeing my privacy or my daughter's innocence I will say "see ya".

Don't explain away your instinct, it is there for a reason

New

Edited January 26, 2010 by Newarcher

[PotashRLS]

He's up to no good!!! If he has no reason to suspect reportable abuse, he has no legal authority to ask her questions like that. Report him to the licensing/ethics board and talk to your local police/sheriff for advice. He just may have other complaints against him that folks are not aware of. He could ultimately be breaching patient confidentiality laws depending on who he told your daughter's comments to.

[buckee]

The dentist excuse for the questions was this :

He said, he noticed the change of who was bringing Megan to her appointments and noticed the change on the billing but was not sure what was going on and needed to know because of legal matters and what not of who had the say in what could be done to Megan' teeth. He said that he has had cases before where someone told him to do work to a child and a few days later, got a call from the other parent flying into him.

.

What a lame excuse. He had absolutely no right questioning your child about these matters whether his reason for doing so was legit or not (which it wasn't).

Good for you Lewis, for contacting him, and putting him on the spot (even though he back peddled and weaseled his lame explanation out) Maybe he'll think twice before he pulls that crap again, on anyone elses children.

[GWSmith]

Again,

Anyway, the dentist started out by saying ............. "Don't tell anyone because you might get me in trouble."

This sentence says it all. He knew what he was doing was wrong.

I would still have her see another dentist if I were you.

I Whole Heartedly Agree with Joe here Lewis...

If anyone has to use that statement in a conversation they use the same language as a predator...Megan was uncomfortable..that previously professional relationship with the dentist was ruined.

On the other hand I'm proud as could be of Megan. She shared that with you and that shows alot of trust...Well Done Young Lady

[Jeramie]

You put him back on his heels. I too would look for another dentist but im guessing you probably wont have any more trouble out of that guy.

[Bob LeBlanc]

...I told him that he could have asked me or her mother or the receptionist and that he was out of line...

And that is the avenue he should have taken, Lewis.

It is not part of his authority to conduct any type of personal 'witch hunt'. If he was actually intent on ensuring the procedures were authorized by the guardian parent, he should not be quizzing the child.

Megan is a minor, and it his duty to see she is NOT put into a compromising (uncomfortable) circumstance.

I'd report this incident.

I'm not comfortable with his explanation...nor should it ever happen again, with ANY of his patients.

A lesson learned by the dentist?...maybe...but it should be monitored by someone who has authority / jurisdiction over him.

He was out-of-line...IMHO

Bob

[Doe-ee]

Don't explain away your instinct, it is there for a reason

New

That's the best advice any parent could get. It saved our daughter (at age 5) from being the next victim of a cunning predator. When he was finally exposed, we both thanked God for those instincts.